WHY?

There are times when I wonder what the hell am I doing?? I would stop in my tracks, look around and found myself feeling lost. There are also times when I try to search for the meaning of life. As stupid as it sounds, that's what I've been searching for for quite awhile now.


I never understand why humans exist at the first place. Are we created by God out of his amusement or his imperfection? Why do we have to live...And then die? What's the point of this cycle. Or are we sinners, who had done something really wrong and our punishment is to try survive as a human being in this world called Earth?

Perhaps there is no God, we're just part of nature in this planet called Earth. We are mammals known as apes that are able to communicate and interact. Then, we were named human beings because of our capabilities. The truth is, I don't know. Just like everyone else. Who? Why? How? Where? When? I have no idea.

Life. From what I know, is like a game. We can't play too hard and hell! No one ever play by rules. In my short 15 years of life, I found something called friendship, family and relationships. I learned that friendships come and go. We can never be too near to friends. Family are the ones who are always there when I fall but they are the ones who hurt me the most.

I found out that nothing stays and last forever. Just like every other teenager in this planet, I feel annoyed, frustrated and I don't know what the hell I want. I know that I'm lucky in lots of way. I may not have a perfect family, well, that's a whole different story. I have great friends, I have my partners(my instruments) and a silly dog at home. I guess it's enough sometimes.


But there are times when some of these important things in my life will have to go. Even if I don't want it to go, it still do. Nothing can stay in my grasp forever, or at least, as long as I want it to.

Everyone around me is always so caught up with reality. Chasing fame, wealth, power, love and possessions 'till they forget who they are. They are like actors, trying to live life that doesn't belong to them. Why?

Plastic surgeries, designer clothes, branded bags, pretty shoes, expensive watches, perfume and colognes, all these temporary things. Is it really worth it to chase after such things? We still get old no matter how much make ups and surgeries, fashion and styles come and go. Everything fades and vanishes with time. Why can't anyone understand that?

Hahaha...Everyday, I would sit and wonder, why the hell are we, the human beings are so foolish? And maybe, just maybe, I'll find out one day. Hopefully..